I’ve often thought about why we Procrastinate. If one was logical, one would assume if there’s something that needed to be done and was Urgent/Important or rewarding enough, we’d get on to it right away.
Here’s what it would look like on a diagram:
The reality however is people are seldom logical. As humans we’re governed partly by our intelligent mind and partly by our feelings and desires. Maybe we’re avoiding a task because we have a low sense of worth or a self-defeating mentality. Maybe we’re avoiding a task because it’s small, petty and annoying (not worth doing). Maybe we’re avoiding a task because it’s too big and we don’t know where to begin (too hard).
Here’s what this would look like on a diagram:
Whatever the actual reasons are, generally when the Pain associated with doing a particular task increases, so too does the level of Procrastination. That’s just human nature – we run away from things which cause us pain.
Let’s consider a couple of typical examples.
- Doing the school report: I’d have to do some research at the library and online. I’m going to have to read lots and take notes. After all that, I’d have to compile the data and write the actual report.
- Going for a 5km run: I’d have to wake up earlier than I normally would. It’d be freezing cold in the morning. I’d have to go to bed earlier. Then there’s the actual run itself – painful and exhausting.
I’m sure you can think of better things to do than that school report or 5km run. It wouldn’t be hard. Let’s see, how about sitting in front of the TV and watching the latest episode of Heroes or Desperate Housewives? Or, calling Jane, your best friend whom you haven’t spoken to for a month? Maybe, you could be making a nice ham and cheese sandwich instead since you had a small lunch?
The good news is Procrastination is a function of both Pain and Payoff. In reality, the relationship is more like so:
As before, Procrastination increases along with Pain.
However, this tapers off as things become more urgent and important. For instance, looming deadlines can kick start us into action this instant! That report is due tomorrow, so we’d better get cracking now. There’s only two more months to the wedding, we’d better start getting up early for a run.
The Payoff also seems more real and tangible. Doing that report 3 weeks in advance has no perceivable increase in Payoff compared to doing it 2 weeks in advance. However, if the report was due tomorrow, the Payoff of doing versus not-doing the report is now very significant. It could be the difference between a pass or fail. Again, similarly with the run. Wedding photos don’t lie so if we didn’t want to look fat, we better start losing the weight now or there won’t be enough time.
So given this information, what can we do to combat Procrastination?
Stop for a moment and think of a particular task you’ve been avoiding. Why have you been putting it off? Is it because of the amount of effort involved? Is it because you don’t have enough time? Is it because you don’t know how to begin? Whatever the reasons, consider the following tips:
- Experience Quantification: Use the Experience Quantification technique to increase the attractiveness of a task by either downgrading the associated Pain or boosting the associated Payoff.
- Set aside some time: Use time boxes, schedule them in your calendar and when the time comes stick to the plan.
- Develop some positive patterns and habits: Get into the habit of doing things and working around good patterns. You’re more likely to keep at things when they become second nature.
- Look at alternate ways of doing things: Don’t just assume every problem is a nail if you have a hammer. Try to look for alternative approaches which may simplify things.
- Pace yourself: Don’t go our strong only to burn out before you get to the finish line. Pace yourself. Break the problem down into smaller chunks and tackle each in turn. You may also apply other great problem solving nuggets.
- Stay motivated: Big and important tasks often require hard work and dedication. Often it’s not a sprint but more of a marathon. Keep yourself motivated with appropriate rewards at key milestones and work within the 10R Success framework.
- Do it now: Don’t let the Broken Windows Theory eventuate. Take on problems early and often, before they get too big and too hard to overcome.
I believe there is a threshold associated with Procrastination. This action/inaction boundary is determined by both Pain and Payoff. These simple tips are all designed to either reduce the Pain associated with a given task or increase the Payoff.
Good luck in your fight against Procrastination!
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Six months or so ago, my life turned a corner. Here I was thinking I’m a busy person, but with the birth of my baby daughter, life is suddenly a whole different ball game.
Not only am I completely time starved, I find it is also difficult to plan around the unpredictable behaviour of a baby – when she screams you just have to drop everything instantly!
This begs the question – How can we cope with a demanding life?
Here’s my list of 15 tips.
1. Reflect on what’s important
I find we are taking on more than our parents ever did. We’re just having busier lives. In today’s world, between working, socialising, exercising and parenting, where’s the time for relaxation? For many of us, I suspect we’ve operated in auto-pilot for so long, we don’t even know if what we’re doing is congruent to our values and goals in life. My advice is to take some time and reflect on what’s truly important in your life then structure your schedule accordingly so you can focus on the right things.
2. Be the master of your own destiny
This is your life. Remember, you can be happy if you choose to and our limitations are mostly self imposed. If there is an aspect of your life which you are unhappy with, then you owe it to yourself to change and make a difference. Unless there are external factors involved, your life won’t get significantly better unless you do something about it. Take charge and be the master of your own destiny. Too stressful at work? Take on less responsibility. Delegate some tasks. Quit. Anything – just take action.
3. Simplify where possible
Human needs are fundamentally basic. From a physical perspective, all we need is food, clothing and shelter. Our emotional needs are more complex, but as long as we’re happy, everything else is just bonus. Take a moment to look at your life, what you have and what you do. You might find that maybe there are aspects to your life and routine which add to your stress but aren’t really essential to your well being. Eliminate these where possible.
4. Learn to cope with stress
Sometimes, things can’t be further simplified. Instead of making our lives less stressful, we can improve our stress coping abilities. Some people read a novel or practice yoga, whilst others spend hours at the golf course or take time out to go on holidays and recharge. Whatever suits your fancy, but do spend the time to de-stress. It is not healthy to operate constantly under high levels of stress.
5. Talk to yourself
Talking to yourself is a powerful tool everyone should have in their personal development arsenal. I find it is useful for so many things and in all sorts of situations. When I’m faced with a stressful situation, talking to myself gets me calm so I can focus on the task at hand. When I’m unsure of what to do, I reflect on what it is I’m trying to accomplish and walk myself through the steps to get things done. When I’m distracted, talking to myself allows me to regain focus and apply the Diminishing Distractions technique. What you do and how you react, is determined by what you say to yourself. So make a habit to say the right things, to help ensure the right results.
6. Talk to others
When life feels too demanding and stressful, find someone you can confide in. Talk about your fears and problems. Don’t keep things bottled up inside. It’s easier to let steam out a little at a time than to wait until the pressure is so strong that you explode! Remember, you don’t have to live life alone. Talk to others – family or friends – and get their emotional support. Not only can they be a good sounding board, but you might find they can offer solutions to your troubles which you haven’t thought of before.
7. Leave work at work
Many people I know don’t stop working when work stops. They take work home or work overtime and get home late. I find one of the most useful tools one can have to cope with a demanding lifestyle is having boundaries. Leave work at work. Make sure the planning provides sufficient time to get things done without breaking your back. It’s ok once in awhile to bring work home, but don’t do it consistently. Learn to draw boundaries and allocate suitable time boxes to spend on things. This applies to everything and not just work.
8. Remove the clutter
I happen to like working with a clean desk and spacious surroundings. I feel less cramped and my brain has room for creative freedom. Not everyone works the same way of course. I have friends whose desks are literally filled with so much paper, you can’t even see the colour of the wood underneath. However, if you have an overly demanding lifestyle, try to remove the clutter. Make sure things are filed in the appropriate places, so that when you’re working on one thing you only have the material related to what you’re working on within arm’s reach. Everything else is a distraction and shouldn’t be easily accessible until you’re ready to work on them. If you work in a chaotic environment, you’re going to live a chaotic life. So clean things up. Get organised.
9. Write things down
If you’re a follower of David Allen’s Getting Things Done methodology, you’d know the importance of writing things down. He believes that if you have too many things in your head, you’d inevitable forget something and they don’t get done. I echo the same sentiments with the addition that if you have too many things in your head, your stress levels tend to be higher. For example, imagine you’re at work and you’re trying not to forget to call the plumber to fix the leaks at home. Or when you’re at the park playing with your children and you’re thinking about the big meeting on Monday. Life feels a lot more complicated, doesn’t it? So, if you haven’t got a task list, start making one. Write things down and free your brain to concentrate on the tasks at hand.
10. Finish things off
Whether you’re a busy professional, a college student or stay at home parent, at any one time you probably juggle several things simultaneously. Whilst multi-tasking is a good skill to have, try not to handle too many things at the same time. Instead, make a point to finish things off. I find that whenever I have unfinished tasks, part of my brain is always working on them, even though it may only be at the sub-conscious level. You may not realise it, but these unfinished tasks contribute to your resting stress level. So try to get things done and closed off, instead of leaving them partially done and occupying precious brain cycles.
11. Learn to say ‘No’
If you find yourself being overwhelmed with the pressures of your current commitments, learn to say ‘No’ to new commitments. Saying ‘No’ isn’t an admission of weakness or reflection on your ability to cope with the pressures of life. It just means, that for now, you don’t have sufficient bandwidth to take on new things. There’s nothing wrong with that. It’s better to give your existing commitments the time they deserve and do a proper job rather than take on too much and do things poorly.
12. Ask for help if you need it
The smartest thing you can do when you feel like you’re overwhelmed and can’t fulfill your commitments is to ask for help. Many people are afraid to ask for help. To them, asking for help is a sign of failure or inability to get things done. To me it is the complete opposite. Asking for help shows maturity and highlights a person’s desire to do a good job. I’d rather work with someone who knows when to ask for help, than someone who works crazily, to the detriment of the project and their health.
13. Accept that life is a series of ups and downs
I don’t know what the proper name for it is, but there are people who observe their health on a daily basis. Every time something unusual happens, they think it’s a terminal medical condition! Similarly, I find there are people who take life just a bit too seriously and are adversely affected emotionally whenever something bad happens. My advice is to take life a little less seriously. There will always be ups and downs. Don’t get too stressed out. This is just life.
14. Adopt a positive outlook and approach to life
It won’t change the reality of your present situation, but it will change your perception of it. You can choose to either look at the obstacles life presents as problems or you can look at them as opportunities. Though it won’t relieve you from your daily pressures, adopting a positive outlook will affect how you approach life’s challenges for positive gain. Remember that life is a journey to be enjoyed. Start now and change the way you look at life.
15. Have faith in yourself
The last tip I have to help with coping with a demanding life is to have faith in yourself. I’ve always believed that the human spirit is our greatest strength. Only when faced with the most difficult situations, challenges and danger do we learn and grow. Believe in yourself! Persevere. If life is tough, then be tougher. You’d be surprised by how amazing you can be if you give yourself a chance.
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In general, I find people tend to welcome the new year with new year’s resolutions. Be a better person. Lose 20kgs. Live a healthier lifestyle. Stop smoking.
Does this sound like you?
Firstly, I think it’s strange that people make resolutions only around the start of the new year. Let’s stop and think about this for a second. If you’re really serious about improving your present condition, why wait for an arbitrary time to do so? Why not start now? Yes, I applaud your intentions. But make a difference now. You have to seriously ask yourself if you’re committed to your desires, if you have to wait (procrastinate) before actually taking action, and sacrificing time and energy towards your goals.
You know it’s true don’t you? To be honest, I’m guilty of that myself. I’ve set myself lofty goals this year including kick starting my new GTD internet venture, writing more frequently on this blog as well as being a good husband and dad. Conveniently, I’ve set these goals as new year’s resolutions. However, they didn’t have to be. I could have started last year, when I formulated these goals and made the “commitment”.
Secondly, it is really important to be realistic when making new year’s resolutions and goal setting in general. Being Realistic is the umbrella element in the 10 R’s to Success as I’ve previously written about.
Let’s explore why that is.
I think it’s a good thing to have intentions to improve one’s life, but be careful not to set yourself unrealistic goals that can lead to failure and disappointment. Let’s quit smoking. Let’s lose 20kgs. These aren’t easy! Losing this much weight in a healthy manner takes lots of hard work, exercise and eating well. While not a smoker myself, I know people who are and am familiar with their struggle to quit.
It’s just not that easy!
New year’s resolutions are notorious for being unrealistic. A new year always come with an expectation that things will get better. Somehow, the slate feels clean each new year and we expect ourselves to become almost superhuman. All our obstacles will crumble before us. All our desires will be fulfilled. I’ve been an advocate of positive thinking before, but let’s be realistic. Unless you elevate your game to the next level, things won’t change significantly.
Ok, you might reduce your daily cigarette intake. Or, you might actually make it to the gym for a couple of weeks. However, let’s face it. It is unlikely you’ll lose 20kgs or stop smoking entirely. That is, unless you elevated your game and truly committed yourself.
Which brings me to my point. Set goals which are realistic. Our ego and psyche are fragile enough. They don’t need to take additional beating by setting ourselves goals which ultimately fail and lead to disappointment. Instead of saying, I’ll lose 20kgs or quit smoking, just start small and go from there. How about, going to the gym twice a week for 2 hour sessions. Or, reduce my daily cigarette intake to 3 a day. Once you achieve these smaller goals and do so on a consistent basis, then press on the pedal. Exercise three times a week. Reduce daily cigarette intake to 2 a day.
Don’t set yourself goals which are unattainable. Build upon each success. Start small and use each little win to boost your confidence and allow you to reach bigger and more ambitious goals. You do know about good goal setting don’t you?
A friend once told me the best time to join a gym is in February. It’s when the punters from new year’s resolutions all drop off. So, perhaps now is a good time to assess the goals you made earlier in the year. Are they achievable? If not, can you set yourself smaller milestones and aim for these first?
As always, I wish you all the best. I too am breaking my goals down into sub-goals and facing each one at a time. Good luck!
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