I have been watching recently the increase in popularity of my post about the 5 steps to accomplish your goals with some interest. When I first wrote the article, I was hoping to articulate a simple framework for anyone to follow. Keeping it simple was important, because in our times of need, simple things can help to keep us motivated and get back on track.
In the months since writing that article, I have expanded on the 5 steps and have come up with a useful framework to apply to personal growth and development in general. Though it is slightly more ambitious in what it aims to cover, it is still easy to understand and follow. Note, the intent is to communicate a high-level framework — one that guides our thinking and actions. It won’t get you from zero to hero on its own, but if you follow it’s principles and philosophy, it may just guide you when you need it the most.
To help you remember it, the framework is simply called 10 R’s to Success.
There are essentially 10 elements to the framework. In the description to follow, I’ll use the word “problem” but you may substitute it with “goal”, “challenge” or “objective” . These are all interchangeable and equally applicable in this context.
Here is how it works:
1. Realistic
If you’re anything like me and have read self-help books before, you’d find that sometimes when you finish one of these books, you’d feel like you can walk through fire and conquer the world. Whilst that’s not necessarily a bad thing, sometimes it can be a little dangerous. Unrealistic goals and expectations can lead to failure and disappointment.
This is why I’ve set being Realistic the most important element of the framework. It wraps the other elements and serves as a reminder that throughout the process, we have to be brutally honest with ourselves about what we are trying to do, whether it is attainable or not and what’s really involved.
2. Realise
The precursor to any change is Realising a change is required. For me, this is typically personified by the “Ah ha” moment. That is, the moment when something inside just clicks by magic and I realise there’s a problem and something needs to be done.
Based on my experience, this is really the first step in the whole process. If we don’t know whether a change is required or not, either nothing would change or something would change but not by choice or conscious effort. The net result of this is we’re left letting the Universe dictate our happiness.
3. Recognise
The Recognise step comes immediately after Realise. It is about identifying what the problem is truly about and whether there are any parallels we can draw from based on our past experiences and circumstances. I find problems are seldom completely unique. If I were to break a problem down, there are always similarities with other things I’ve done before. Recognise is the step in which we try to figure out what the problem is about and whether we’ve solved similar things before.
4. Reframe
Sometimes, our initial assessment of a problem can be incorrect. Often, I find this is because the problem is poorly defined. Reframing is the feedback step which allows us to restate the problem in a different way and in doing so perhaps Realise and Recognise the problem as something else entirely. This can sometimes cast a problem in a different light and present a solution which may otherwise not be obvious.
5. Respond
Although Respond is depicted as the next step which comes after Recognise, it doesn’t really occur until the problem is fully Realised, Recognised and Reframed (if necessary).
Respond is an action step. It is about taking the problem we have identified and working at the action items until the problem is resolved. I find using solutions I have applied to similar issues, keeping things positive and other great problem solving nuggets to be useful here.
6. Review
Have we actually resolved the issue? That’s a question we should always ask, even though it may seem obvious for simple problems. Review is the time we do this and it’s important because without it, we may never learn from our mistakes or know if our solution has done the job or not. If we aren’t satisfied for whatever reason, we will need to Repeat a few things.
7. Repeat
Repeat is the step which we follow if for whatever reason the solutions we have put in place does not meet all the requirements we have identified.
I find as I work on a problem, my initial assumptions can be incorrect. For these cases, I repeat the Recognise step to redefine and potentially reframe the problem. Sometimes also, I may need to re-execute and re-implement for no other reason than me making mistakes the first time through. For these cases, I simple Respond again.
8. Reflect
Reflection is similar to Review in the sense that we are comparing what we’ve done against what we have set out to do. Whilst Review is focused mainly on the problem itself, Reflect is about matching what we’ve done against our overall mission statement and goals in life.
I’ve always believed that life is too short to be doing things that are not congruent to our life’s goals. Reflection is the step in which we pause for a second to ask if we’re doing the right thing. If we aren’t perhaps we need to reassess our position and change.
While this isn’t a step we need to do all the time, I find it pays to do it occasionally simply because sometimes we can work in auto-pilot, get bogged down with the realities of life and forget what’s really important to us.
9. Reward
I described this step in the original post about the 5 steps to accomplishing your goals and I’ll briefly reiterate it here. If you have met all the requirements of the problem and are measuring well against your overall goals, then reward yourself. This is an important step because it helps to keep us motivated. As with the other steps, ensure your Rewards are Realistic!
10. Renew
The final element in the framework is Renew. Renew is essentially using the results of the work you have just done and the things you have just achieved as a motivator for new and more ambitious goals. Use it as a launching platform to set your sights to new things which may not have seem possible or Realistic before.
In conclusion
Life is a continuous process of discovery and learning. We only stop doing either of these when we die. At this very moment, you are discovering new things, experiencing interesting events, learning and growing constantly. For any given problem, challenge or goal, pause for a moment and identify which step you’re at. The great thing is you don’t have to start at the beginning of the flow. Just start applying the 10 R’s to Success based on where you’re at right now, irrespective of the problem.
I hope what I’ve written makes sense. I don’t think I’ve fleshed it out as well as I could have in this article. If you have any questions, feel free to leave a comment. If you can, please provide me with some input on what works and what doesn’t based on your own experiences, so I can incorporate your suggestions and improve the overall effectiveness of the framework for one and all.
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Each of us at one stage or another have succumbed to a distraction or two.
Let’s face it. We all do it. Personally, when I’m at home, I find I would make excuses not to sit at my desk. I’ll be flicking through some catalogue, turning on the tv or playing on the Xbox. When I’m in the office, I’ll gravitate towards social bookmarking sites like Digg, Delicious and Reddit. Unfortunately, some of us tend to be weaker than others and indulge in our desires more often than we really should!
Distractions as a whole are a huge drain on every aspect of who we are. It takes our focus away from what we should be doing – our tasks, goals and purpose. This is why we have to eliminate them from our lives if possible! Personally, I find if I was to indulge in a distraction, a hour could go by and before I know it, I’d blow away an entire time box. Generally, this makes me feel drained and disappointed, not just in myself for having been weak but also about the lost opportunities and productive time I could have spent working on an article or researching a business venture.
So what can we do about it? If you haven’t done so yet, take a look at two articles I wrote about how to stay focused – 18 ways to stay focused at work and the more generic 11 ways to staying focused. These tips are great, but inevitably distractions will happen. When they do, how can we reduce our urge and tendency to indulge in them?
Here’s something very simple I do in my head whenever I feel the urge to indulge in a distraction. I don’t know who came up with it originally or even if it is unique to me, so for now, I call this technique Diminishing Distractions. This is how it works.
Essentially, a distraction is attactive because of two reasons:
- It gives us pleasure.
- It takes pain away.
When we indulge in a distraction, we focus our time and energy on something that is inherently more pleasurable than what we are currently doing. Solving that problem is hard, so I’ll just surf on Digg instead. Finishing this document is going to take some time, so let me squeeze in 30mins on the Xbox. Making that call to the customer will be challenging, so let me read the news first. Now, tell me if you’ve never felt this way before. The reason these things are attactive is because they either give us pleasure or take some pain away.
So in order for us to minimise the time we indulge in our distractions, what we need to do is either decrease the pleasure we get or the pain they take away. The trick to doing this is by quantifying our experiences. That is, measure how much enjoyment we hope to get by indulging in our distraction and then diminish that enjoyment in our minds to a level low enough that it is no longer appealing.
To do this:
1. Rate the experience on a scale of -10 to +10. What the scale means: -10 being something I really hate doing and there’s nothing in the world to make me like it and +10 being something that gives me ultimate pleasure and utter enjoyment. For example, at any given moment, playing on the Xbox may rate +6 on my scale (I have fun and it gives me pleasure but it’s not the best thing since slice bread).
2. Think of things to lower the rating by one or two points. Once you have the rating, try to think of things to make the experience less enjoyable. This doesn’t mean a massive jump from +6 to a -10. It means lowering the enjoyment in a small way. For example, I might associate the discomfort of sitting on the floor with playing on the Xbox. After 30mins in this posture, it’s going to hurt. This will lower the experience for me to a +4 on my scale (It’s still fun, but less so now than before).
3. Repeat until the experience is neutral (ie a rating of 0). Keep thinking of things to diminish the experience (either the pleasure or pain) until you don’t really care either way whether you do it or not. Once you are indifferent, you stand a better chance of resisting the distraction. Here are some of the things I think will make the Xbox experience less enjoyable – lengthy wait times when saving, small tv with bad colours, tired shoulders and a sore neck.
4. Consider what you should be doing instead. At this point, look at what you’re currently doing or plan to do. Ask yourself would you rather be doing this or indulge in your distraction? For me, I ask myself “Would I rather finish this document I am in the middle of or play on the Xbox?”. I find most of the time, because the distraction’s experience is neutral, I’d rather continue what I’m doing. If this isn’t the case, move on to the next step.
5. Make the experience unappealing and undesirable. If you still rather indulge in the distraction, then repeat Step 2 and make the experience unappealing and undesirable. The trick to this is you don’t have to come up with completely realistic things. All you need to do is convince your mind about what you want it to feel regarding the distraction. For example, what would make the Xbox unappealing for me are – melting ice cream on the controller (I hate getting my hands dirty), not wearing my glasses (what’s the point of playing when I can’t see what’s going on), ear plugs (I can’t hear a thing) etc. Keep doing this until you take the experience to a -10.
Once you hit -10, this being a level which you associate with things you absolutely hate doing and nothing can make you do it, it becomes really easy to resist the distraction. You don’t even have to put up a fight. As far as your mind is concerned, you don’t want to do it.
I call this technique Diminishing Distractions – that is we are diminishing the experience we hope to get by indulging in the distraction. Simple isn’t it? It is. But that’s the beauty of it. When faced with a particular undesirable urge, what we need is a simple technique we can use and rely on to suppress that urge. What we don’t want is a technique that has 50 checklist items for us to go through, because in most cases we either won’t bother or it’ll take too long to work! With some practise, you will find you can associate a 0 or a -10 to any distraction and make them less desirable than what we should be doing.
Here’s the other beautiful part of this technique. Not only can you apply it to the distraction, you can also apply it to the task you should be working on. All you have to do is apply the technique in the steps I’ve outlined above but in a positive way and try to make the experience a +10 instead. By doing this, you will increase the gap between the experience you will get from this task and the distraction. For example, let’s say I really wanted to focus on writing. To make writing a +10 experience, I could visualise myself writing a top notch Diggable article (hint, hint), having lots of positive comments from my readers and earning lots of money from Adsense! If this doesn’t make this a +10 experience, I don’t know what will! 
I’ve written in the past that we can be happy if we choose to. I just want to take a moment to reiterate a particular point in that article because I think the repetition will help the message sink in. If you rely on external events to determine your happiness, than you relinquish control about when you will be happy. By using the technique I’ve outlined above, you take control of the way you feel about a particular experience. If you apply it to other aspects of your life, you will be able to control whether you have a -10 experience or a +10 experience irrespective of what happens. Sometimes we cannot prevent bad things from happening, but what we can control is how we react and respond to them.
That’s food for thought.
If you choose to employ this technique in your daily lives, drop me a comment or message. I would like to hear whatever feedback you may have on this. Good luck with your battle against distractions!
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Most of the time I think we can cruise through life without having any major goals. However, for things that are truly worth accomplishing, specifying the ins and outs of a goal is pretty important. Wouldn’t it be nice to have a few simple steps we can follow to describe how we can approach our goals and ensure we accomplish them?
Well, here’s my attempt at defining a nice simple 5 step framework anyone can follow. In this post, I’ll use losing weight, getting fit and going to the gym as one concrete example. However, you can apply it to any goal you have as the steps are equally as relevant.
1. Define your goal and give it shape
The very first thing you need to do is to define your goal. After all, without knowing what the goal actually is, how can you go about accomplishing it?
Goal setting is an art form. It is about articulating what your goal is about, being realistic in whether you can accomplish it or not and providing the metrics to track your progress. I’ve written about the characteristics of a good goal before, so read that post first if you haven’t yet done so.
To give your goal shape, I find it is helpful to actually write it down. Get a fresh piece of paper and describe each of the following characteristics for your goal.
In my example of losing weight and getting fit:
- Conceivable: I intend to lose 24 kgs within 12 months and be capable of running 3 kms in 10 mins.
- Achievable: I am able to commit to two 90 min sessions. With a proper training program and commitment, I am assured by various fitness instructors that this is achievable.
- Measurable: I will track how many kgs I lose each month. In the simpliest scenario, I must lose 2 kgs per month to attain my goal.
- Aligned: Losing weight and getting fit is congruent to my other goals in life which is about being happy about who I am and how I look.
- Worthwhile: I acknowledge this is a challenging task, but it is something worth accomplishing. I would like to live a healthy life so I can watch my kids grow up and get married.
- Desirable: This is something I truly wish to accomplish and will do everything I can to attain it. I desire this more than eating fried chickens and carrot cakes.
2. Identify the next few tasks
Once you have your goal properly defined and shaped, identify the next few tasks you need to do in relation to your goal. Unlike traditional project management where you define all the tasks, dependencies and contingencies, this step is about identifying the next few tasks only.
Why the next few only? There are a couple of reasons: Firstly, unless you are used to planning or have a crystal ball, there is no way you can accurately plan every single action you need to take to accomplish your goal. Secondly, you can only work on a few things at a time, so all you need is a few actions to start the ball rolling.
In my example, the next tasks to being fit and healthy are:
- Assess the equipment, staff and pricing for all local gyms.
- Buy two sets of appropriate gym wear.
- Get some good headphones to plug into the gym’s music system.
- Free up all after work commitments for Tuesdays and Thursdays.
Although there are possibly a myriad of other tasks I would have to act on to accomplish this goal, they are not essentially the next tasks. For example, getting a trainer and an exercise program are tasks I can only perform after signing up with a particular gym so I don’t bother writing these down now.
Try it for yourself. First write down the definition of your goal. On the same piece of paper, write down the next 3-5 things you need to do in relation to this goal.
3. Set aside time and work through your tasks
After you have defined your goal and identified the next tasks and actions, prepare some time to actually work on them. One effective technique I have found which works for me is Time boxing. Essentially, Time boxing is a technique in which we limit the amount of time we spend on a given task. So instead of working until the task is “done”, we spend say 30 mins on it. It is either “done” at that point or we schedule another 30 mins to work on it another time. Time boxing is effective because we instantly focus on what’s important, avoid potential overruns and can act as a motivator against procrastination.
Another thing I should mention here is the importance of actually dedicating a time slot for working at your tasks. By this I mean, actually blocking out a period in the day or week in which you are actively looking at your task list and crossing things off. The reason why this is important is because we can have busy lives and sometimes we use this as an excuse not to do something. By allocating time, we have no excuses and can also establish good habits and positive patterns.
In my example, blocking out 90 mins on Tuesday and Thursday nights after work applies both the Time boxing and the regular routine techniques to my weekly patterns.
4. Review and reward
One of the most important thing about accomplishing goals is measuring your progress and reviewing your goal and assumptions as you go. If you are measuring well against your goal, you can reward yourself.
The trick about reviewing your goals and tasks is to pick a system that you trust. Some people prefer the paper based planners, whilst others prefer the electronic alternatives like a PDA or Microsoft Outlook. As far as I’m concerned, it doesn’t matter. What’s important is to have a system you trust and will look at periodically. In the past, I used Outlook to track my outstanding tasks. However, this has proved ineffective for me because I split my day between work and home and never do I have a single Outlook installation which has both my “work” and “personal” tasks available at the same time. As a consequence, I didn’t look at the tasks periodically and eventually stopped adding them altogether.
Why is it important to reward yourself? Well, some goals are difficult to accomplish and may require both time and ongoing effort. Rewarding yourself is simple way keep motivated. In my example on fitness and going to the gym, I can reward myself by buying a new set of running shoes in order to encourage myself to reach that 3 kms in 10 mins benchmark.
5. Revisit, revise and reassess if required
The flip side of tracking well is not tracking well. You may have to revise your goal or reassess any assumptions you may have made in order to be pragmatic and realistic about how achievable your goals really are.
Why is it important to revise our plans? Sometimes we set goals which are simply unrealistic, perhaps through no fault of our own. For example, dedicating two days each week to go to the gym could be too demanding on our schedules. Perhaps we have to pick the kids up from day care after work or we have a deadline which requires us to stay a bit later. Whatever the reasons, sometimes things don’t pan out as we originally planned. That’s ok, all we need to do is revise our plans. That could mean scaling back our commitments or planning around them. If work is making us stay back late, perhaps we can consider going to the gym in the mornings or take shorter lunch breaks.
One common mistake I see people make is punishing themselves when they fail to meet a certain commitment. For example, if I have committed to two days per week of going to the gym, missing one session may provoke a vengeful reaction from my inner self. I can punish myself by promising to go three times next week. In my experience, this is usually a bad idea for a couple of reasons. Firstly, we may make good on our promise in the short term but seldom would it work in the longer term. So what happens if we miss another session or another or another? Are we going to keep promising to have three session weeks? Secondly, it associates a negative thing to our goal. Given enough occurrences of this negative thing, we may give up the goal entirely which is obviously something which we do not want to happen.
I prefer the approach of revising our plans or our initial assumptions. This keeps our mind focused on the positives of our goal and outcomes. The trick is to determine the fine line in the sand between revising our goals because the assumptions were incorrect and our general “slackness” in working at our next tasks and actions.
In conclusion
The 5 steps I have described above hopefully can provide you with a framework for accomplishing your goals. Remember, start with a well defined goal by ensuring you describe the 6 characteristics of a good goal. If you want more reading material, you can also take a look at Steve Pavlina’s latest post in which he talks about setting goals you will actually achieve. Once you have your goal defined, identify the next immediate tasks and actions. Then set aside some time and block it out so you can actually dedicate some brain power and resources to completing them. Frequently review your progress and either reward yourself or revise your plans.
If you have any comments about goal setting and this simple 5 step framework, feel free to leave a comment.
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