Big Bang New Year’s Resolution is Bad
February 8th, 2007 by Dave Cheong
In general, I find people tend to welcome the new year with new year’s resolutions. Be a better person. Lose 20kgs. Live a healthier lifestyle. Stop smoking.
Does this sound like you?
Firstly, I think it’s strange that people make resolutions only around the start of the new year. Let’s stop and think about this for a second. If you’re really serious about improving your present condition, why wait for an arbitrary time to do so? Why not start now? Yes, I applaud your intentions. But make a difference now. You have to seriously ask yourself if you’re committed to your desires, if you have to wait (procrastinate) before actually taking action, and sacrificing time and energy towards your goals.
You know it’s true don’t you? To be honest, I’m guilty of that myself. I’ve set myself lofty goals this year including kick starting my new GTD internet venture, writing more frequently on this blog as well as being a good husband and dad. Conveniently, I’ve set these goals as new year’s resolutions. However, they didn’t have to be. I could have started last year, when I formulated these goals and made the “commitment”.
Secondly, it is really important to be realistic when making new year’s resolutions and goal setting in general. Being Realistic is the umbrella element in the 10 R’s to Success as I’ve previously written about.
Let’s explore why that is.
I think it’s a good thing to have intentions to improve one’s life, but be careful not to set yourself unrealistic goals that can lead to failure and disappointment. Let’s quit smoking. Let’s lose 20kgs. These aren’t easy! Losing this much weight in a healthy manner takes lots of hard work, exercise and eating well. While not a smoker myself, I know people who are and am familiar with their struggle to quit.
It’s just not that easy!
New year’s resolutions are notorious for being unrealistic. A new year always come with an expectation that things will get better. Somehow, the slate feels clean each new year and we expect ourselves to become almost superhuman. All our obstacles will crumble before us. All our desires will be fulfilled. I’ve been an advocate of positive thinking before, but let’s be realistic. Unless you elevate your game to the next level, things won’t change significantly.
Ok, you might reduce your daily cigarette intake. Or, you might actually make it to the gym for a couple of weeks. However, let’s face it. It is unlikely you’ll lose 20kgs or stop smoking entirely. That is, unless you elevated your game and truly committed yourself.
Which brings me to my point. Set goals which are realistic. Our ego and psyche are fragile enough. They don’t need to take additional beating by setting ourselves goals which ultimately fail and lead to disappointment. Instead of saying, I’ll lose 20kgs or quit smoking, just start small and go from there. How about, going to the gym twice a week for 2 hour sessions. Or, reduce my daily cigarette intake to 3 a day. Once you achieve these smaller goals and do so on a consistent basis, then press on the pedal. Exercise three times a week. Reduce daily cigarette intake to 2 a day.
Don’t set yourself goals which are unattainable. Build upon each success. Start small and use each little win to boost your confidence and allow you to reach bigger and more ambitious goals. You do know about good goal setting don’t you?
A friend once told me the best time to join a gym is in February. It’s when the punters from new year’s resolutions all drop off. So, perhaps now is a good time to assess the goals you made earlier in the year. Are they achievable? If not, can you set yourself smaller milestones and aim for these first?
As always, I wish you all the best. I too am breaking my goals down into sub-goals and facing each one at a time. Good luck!
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10 R’s to Apply if you Want to Succeed
February 5th, 2007 by Dave Cheong
I have been watching recently the increase in popularity of my post about the 5 steps to accomplish your goals with some interest. When I first wrote the article, I was hoping to articulate a simple framework for anyone to follow. Keeping it simple was important, because in our times of need, simple things can help to keep us motivated and get back on track.
In the months since writing that article, I have expanded on the 5 steps and have come up with a useful framework to apply to personal growth and development in general. Though it is slightly more ambitious in what it aims to cover, it is still easy to understand and follow. Note, the intent is to communicate a high-level framework — one that guides our thinking and actions. It won’t get you from zero to hero on its own, but if you follow it’s principles and philosophy, it may just guide you when you need it the most.
To help you remember it, the framework is simply called 10 R’s to Success.
There are essentially 10 elements to the framework. In the description to follow, I’ll use the word “problem” but you may substitute it with “goal”, “challenge” or “objective” . These are all interchangeable and equally applicable in this context.
Here is how it works:
1. Realistic
If you’re anything like me and have read self-help books before, you’d find that sometimes when you finish one of these books, you’d feel like you can walk through fire and conquer the world. Whilst that’s not necessarily a bad thing, sometimes it can be a little dangerous. Unrealistic goals and expectations can lead to failure and disappointment.
This is why I’ve set being Realistic the most important element of the framework. It wraps the other elements and serves as a reminder that throughout the process, we have to be brutally honest with ourselves about what we are trying to do, whether it is attainable or not and what’s really involved.
2. Realise
The precursor to any change is Realising a change is required. For me, this is typically personified by the “Ah ha” moment. That is, the moment when something inside just clicks by magic and I realise there’s a problem and something needs to be done.
Based on my experience, this is really the first step in the whole process. If we don’t know whether a change is required or not, either nothing would change or something would change but not by choice or conscious effort. The net result of this is we’re left letting the Universe dictate our happiness.
3. Recognise
The Recognise step comes immediately after Realise. It is about identifying what the problem is truly about and whether there are any parallels we can draw from based on our past experiences and circumstances. I find problems are seldom completely unique. If I were to break a problem down, there are always similarities with other things I’ve done before. Recognise is the step in which we try to figure out what the problem is about and whether we’ve solved similar things before.
4. Reframe
Sometimes, our initial assessment of a problem can be incorrect. Often, I find this is because the problem is poorly defined. Reframing is the feedback step which allows us to restate the problem in a different way and in doing so perhaps Realise and Recognise the problem as something else entirely. This can sometimes cast a problem in a different light and present a solution which may otherwise not be obvious.
5. Respond
Although Respond is depicted as the next step which comes after Recognise, it doesn’t really occur until the problem is fully Realised, Recognised and Reframed (if necessary).
Respond is an action step. It is about taking the problem we have identified and working at the action items until the problem is resolved. I find using solutions I have applied to similar issues, keeping things positive and other great problem solving nuggets to be useful here.
6. Review
Have we actually resolved the issue? That’s a question we should always ask, even though it may seem obvious for simple problems. Review is the time we do this and it’s important because without it, we may never learn from our mistakes or know if our solution has done the job or not. If we aren’t satisfied for whatever reason, we will need to Repeat a few things.
7. Repeat
Repeat is the step which we follow if for whatever reason the solutions we have put in place does not meet all the requirements we have identified.
I find as I work on a problem, my initial assumptions can be incorrect. For these cases, I repeat the Recognise step to redefine and potentially reframe the problem. Sometimes also, I may need to re-execute and re-implement for no other reason than me making mistakes the first time through. For these cases, I simple Respond again.
8. Reflect
Reflection is similar to Review in the sense that we are comparing what we’ve done against what we have set out to do. Whilst Review is focused mainly on the problem itself, Reflect is about matching what we’ve done against our overall mission statement and goals in life.
I’ve always believed that life is too short to be doing things that are not congruent to our life’s goals. Reflection is the step in which we pause for a second to ask if we’re doing the right thing. If we aren’t perhaps we need to reassess our position and change.
While this isn’t a step we need to do all the time, I find it pays to do it occasionally simply because sometimes we can work in auto-pilot, get bogged down with the realities of life and forget what’s really important to us.
9. Reward
I described this step in the original post about the 5 steps to accomplishing your goals and I’ll briefly reiterate it here. If you have met all the requirements of the problem and are measuring well against your overall goals, then reward yourself. This is an important step because it helps to keep us motivated. As with the other steps, ensure your Rewards are Realistic!
10. Renew
The final element in the framework is Renew. Renew is essentially using the results of the work you have just done and the things you have just achieved as a motivator for new and more ambitious goals. Use it as a launching platform to set your sights to new things which may not have seem possible or Realistic before.
In conclusion
Life is a continuous process of discovery and learning. We only stop doing either of these when we die. At this very moment, you are discovering new things, experiencing interesting events, learning and growing constantly. For any given problem, challenge or goal, pause for a moment and identify which step you’re at. The great thing is you don’t have to start at the beginning of the flow. Just start applying the 10 R’s to Success based on where you’re at right now, irrespective of the problem.
I hope what I’ve written makes sense. I don’t think I’ve fleshed it out as well as I could have in this article. If you have any questions, feel free to leave a comment. If you can, please provide me with some input on what works and what doesn’t based on your own experiences, so I can incorporate your suggestions and improve the overall effectiveness of the framework for one and all.
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Reader Question: What Does a Time Box Look Like?
October 4th, 2006 by Dave Cheong
In my previous post, I mentioned that I am going to flesh out some of the responses I have made to people who have contacted me directly for advice. Continuing with this, here is an email I received from a reader (let’s call him John) which I thought may be useful to share:
Hi Dave,
I’m an artist. I also have OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder). To that end I have a very difficult time staying on task with things and making things happen. I’ve been searching for ways to organize myself in an effort to not procrastinate, break down tasks etc. My question may be elementary and silly but what does a time box look like? I mean, is it a flow chart? Is it open to interpretation, just a title, and a list of things to do to make the task complete?
Thanks for your time and I like your site.
John
Hi John,
Thank you for your email. Let me see if I can tailor a response to your needs.
As an artist, I imagine you work on things which by nature are open ended. For these types of tasks, it is difficult to identify when something is complete. I used to sketch a lot in the past and although I didn’t do it at a professional level, I know what it feels like when a piece of artwork is in progress and never quite complete. In many ways, the 80/20 rule applies, where the remaining 20% takes up 80% of the time!
I can’t say I know what it feels like to have OCD. If I did have it, I imagine it would affect how much attention I pay to detail and how I approach work and life in general. Even the simplest and most mundane thing could be time consuming.
This is where I think Time boxing could really help. Time boxing is essentially fixing the amount of time you have available to work on things. When the time is up, you make a conscious decision at that point whether it is done or not. When working on a sketch, one can decide after 30 mins if the sketch is “good enough” and can be considered complete or not. If not, you allocate another time slot to continue working on it. This time slot can be the next thing you do, or it could be later in the week. It doesn’t matter which really. The most important thing about Time boxing is being aware of the passing of time.
It is pretty much open to intepretation. What I suggest for you is this:
1. Plan your day out
Start each day by deciding how many Time boxes you need and what you hope to achieve in these Time boxes. For you, I suggest being explicit about what is going to be done in a certain Time box. As with all goals, make sure they are well-defined and includes the 6 elements of a good goal. The other benefit of doing this at the start of each day is you have a holistic view of the day. I mean, by the end of each Time box, it is easier to make a call on whether a given task is complete or not simply because you have a holistic view of the day and can judge how much work is outstanding.
2. Try not to overrun
Make this a goal and record everything. What I mean is for you to make it a goal for each day to stick to your Time boxes. In the beginning you might get it wrong and be overly optimistic about how much you can accomplish in a given day. However, over time, your estimates will become better as you become more conscious of time and how long it takes to do things. Try and record everything, even things which are mundane. For OCD, I imagine you would find yourself constantly doing things again and again, just because you can’t help yourself. If you record how much time you spend on a given task, if you find yourself spending more time than usual on it, then use the recorded times to convince yourself to stop and move on! Also, in doing so, you focus on the outcomes and results and less so on the activity part of the work.
3. Buy a stop clock
I have recently decided to get a stop clock which sits on my table, going “ding” every 30 mins. I’ve only been trying this recently, but it makes me aware of time. Sometimes when I’m working, I lose track of time and could overrun on a Time box without realising it. However, with this simple yet practical change, the clock reminds me every time 30 mins elapses. It might be a good way to interrupt your thinking/working and remind you to focus on results and getting things done.
Format of a Time box
As for your question about what a Time box really looks like - simply it is free form. It can be whatever you want it to look like. However, the following elements must be present in a Time box:
- Time - how long it is. Note, you don’t need to have the same time duration for all your time boxes. Some Time boxes can be shorter than others depending on the actual time of day and the work to be done. For example a Time box for me in the morning before work is 1 hour (because that’s how much free time I have before I have to get ready) but a Time box during a working day is only 30 mins (I plan my work around short time slots so I can better report on progress).
- Task title - the work to be done. This statement describes succinctly what you aim to do in the Time box. For you, that could be working on a sketch. For me, that could be spending time on writing an article or responding to emails. In your case, I suggest being explicit and spell things out fully.
- Outcome - when it is considered complete. For a given task, identify when the task is complete. To do so, write down the outcome of the task. Use this at the end of every Time box to decide if what you aim to do has been accomplished or not.
Does this help? I hope it does and wish you all the best. It would be great to hear what you come up with and what works and doesn’t. If you haven’t read my article on how to stay focused, please take a look. In it, you may find a nugget which you can incorporate into your daily habits and patterns.
If there is anyone out there who has experience helping people with OCD or time management in general, feel free to leave a comment.
John, good luck to you!
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